We’ve all seen them. Unattractive looking guys in public who happen to be hand-in-hand with a gorgeous girlfriend or wife.
You think to yourself… he’s probably mega rich… or that she’s just in it for the fame or money.
Let’s face it – we all have our judgements about people who “punch above their weight”. But they’re the ones that landed the partner they really wanted, and how often does that happen?
On a personal note, I don’t judge people by their “attractiveness”, there are just good apples and bad apples for me personally. But there’s no denying that it happens frequently – more often than we like to admit.
Frankly, I say more power to them.
However, it also leaves some of us scratching our heads, wondering just what their “secret” is.
Seeing that I know many of the people who date “out of their league”, I can safely say that there are a few things that make them really stand out.
I love people, good looking, not good looking, short, tall, you name it.
But there are certain behaviors that make an impact on other people – and guess what?
I think it’s what makes them some of the MOST attractive people on the planet.
What are these secrets you ask…
Well, let’s say you just imagined the scenario of the so called “unattractive” person in question and their beautiful partner.
Instead of feeling jealous, or insecure about it do you:
1). Dismiss it and say they must have gotten lucky
2). Think about how you’re just “not right” for it
3). Think negative thoughts like how you just don’t have enough money, talent, or “X”
All that said, it doesn’t matter what your thoughts are about someone who’s got more success than you.
The fact is, they went for it, and they got it.
What happens when you make judgements like that is you’re also diminishing yourself.
And that’s what we’re about to talk about.
What about you and YOUR “romantic success”?
Are you “bowing yourself out” before even talking to your dream guy or girl?
Are you talking yourself out of an opportunity because you don’t think you have the chops?
What if you just went for it?
After all… the WORST thing that can happen is this:
The worst scenario is that nothing will come of your attempts to make something happen, get groovy with someone, or just taking a risk putting yourself out there.
So what do all the people you were judging earlier have that you don’t?
That’s the core of why many people who would be deemed “unattractive” by most people’s standards, can become some of the MOST attractive.
Whether it’s in your circle of friends, the local bar, or at a party.
Wherever it is doesn’t really matter. Confidence is the common thread that makes every single person I know either tip the “attraction” scale in their favor, or lower it, regardless of what they look like. One of my friends who naturally has confidence insists that it’s the pheromone products he uses from “House Of Pheromones”, but what do I know. Nevertheless, women have always found him a fascinating conversationalist, and intriguing beyond belief because of his immense “aura”.
But that’s not the most interesting part. It’s not JUST about attracting your ideal partner or getting the hottest guy/girl you can get.
Confidence also leads to major success in other areas of your life (where it matters).
Confidence gets you promoted, seen as a natural “leader”, and makes people see you as someone to look up to.
As someone who was “destined” to be a man repelling loser forever (high school, sigh), I know that rejection sucks.
But only if you let it hurt you.
If you look at things in such a black and white way, it seems unlikely that someone would get someone so far “above their league” (I really dislike judging people on their attractiveness, but it’s just to make a point).
But remember, this person likely didn’t really care what other people might think, or even of himself.
They just went for it.
So before feeling jealousy, insecurity, or making another excuse about why you can’t have what they have, be sure you’re not shooting yourself in the foot first.
The next time instead of just saying how the person is probably “rich”, or just “lucky”, what about creating some of that for yourself?
You may just find that you had what it took all along, you just had to get out of your own way.